Friday, June 10, 2011

Too strong to be a Gorean slave?

"She is too strong to be a Gorean slave."

I have seen this sentiment expressed from time to time, either directly or implied, over the years I have interacted with others who have explored living Gorean in this society. In every case it was tossed out by the one who used to own the girl, after she failed. Often, upon questioning, the thought was noted to have originated with the girl who failed herself. I have seen it used as both an excuse and as a rationalization - both to little effect on the eventual outcome.

Can a woman be too "strong" to be a Gorean slave?

The notion obviously presupposes that in order to *actually* surrender ones life to another, that one must be weak, or incomplete, or in some way damaged (the "door mat", "automaton" and "mindless zombie" syndrome/excuse). This is, of course, just a handy smoke screen to toss out by the girl who just shown by her actions that she could not, despite her best effort, actually surrender to a man. It seeks to denigrate and swipe at those few women who prove that they can, by implying that there is something wrong with them that they can actually give more than lip-service to the notion of surrender. It is also handy for the man, allowing him a manner of getting off the hook, so to speak, for his inability to recognise that what he had was in no way a Gorean slave, and his inability therefore to control what should have been his property but what in reality was nothing more than a sub eventually topping a dominant man.

So can a woman be too strong to be a Gorean slave?

Strength is the single most important trait a woman can have, if she seeks to be a Gorean slave. Nothing, and I mean nothing is more important than that is in her efforts to live a surrendered life to a Gorean man. It is the fuel, so to speak, for everything that she does, all the decisions that she makes, and probably the most obvious that we online see, the things that she "says".

A strong girl who seeks to be a Gorean slave does not give in to the temptation to rage at a free person or free peoples. She has the strength to resist calling them names if they upset her and even if they are being "unfair" to her. She does not allow her frustration at the difficulty of trying to live Gorean in a society that rejects many of its tenets to cause her to be displeasing, and to fail. She does not allow her lonliness to cause her to lash out, when she realizes that she may never belong to a Gorean man due to the small numbers of actual Gorean men in existance.

(Note that I, in no way said that the girl denies her feelings. Simply that her strength allows her to deny them to be used as the excuse to cause her to be displeasing.)

In short, she has the strength to succeed, not fail. She uses her strength to fuel her surrender, to get her over the rough times, to keep her on the right path and not as an excuse for her inability to do anything deeper than simply submit when it pleases her to do so.

As I have told literally thousands of girls: "Being a Gorean slave is the hardest easy thing you will ever do in your life." ;0)

Some simply do not have the strength to achieve it. No man can give it to them nor can they demand it of them. It is why there are, in truth, very few women who can become Gorean slaves in our society. It is why some women have value as Gorean slaves, and others are valueless in that same regard.

That is why those scant few can succeed, and why the rest are left with nothing but excuses, rationalizations and denial.

I wish you well.

Bear-